less than 2 weeks...

so i have one more week of work then a week of stuffing everything i want to bring in my two bags. this past weekend i spent in salem with luke and the portland gang (minus a few). running around salem in one hundred degree weather was not as bad as it sounds. i had dinner at my uncle's, met luke's dad and sibs and cousin, then met eric's mom and dad and aunt and uncle and grandma and sisters, ect. meeting different families and talking to new people is always fun and it was definitely a good time, this was followed by a failed trip to the zoo and a late night trip to sauvie island. running around mostly naked on the beach and in the water was a good time, but it makes me feel lost. the whole weekend made me feel a little lost. with so little time left there are a million things i want to squeeze in and every one i miss out on feels like something that will never happen again. and it won't, at least not in the same way. so this next week i don't know what to do. should i go to bars every night with my no money? run around on my bike and try to visit with people? spend time with my family? i have no idea what i want to do besides not be home. i don't want to be home. not that i don't enjoy hanging out with bert and elena, but being at the apartment (or my parent’s house) seems like such a waste. but i'm so exhausted, and recovering from being really dehydrated yesterday, that i should be sitting on the couch, vegging out. but i don't want to. and probably the weirdest thing is even though clearly i call elena's place home, i still feel rather homeless and i have a feeling that for at least the next three months i'll have the same feeling in japan. i don't even want to think about it. my skills of denial are ruling my life right now. but i still feel the weight of my impending departure like a tons of bricks on my back.